Author: Amy Cravey

Uncategorized

I’M FINE

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“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Romans 12:2 ESV

I’m fine. I really am. It’s all fine. All is good. I feel good. And fine. Yes, good and fine. I feel them both. But then …

Why do I feel anxious? Why do I feel off-center? Why do I feel distracted? Why do I feel angry or snappy or blue?

It seems like it’s not really me, but I feel it. Then I’m confused, like a yappy dog that doesn’t know if they are glad to see you or mad you’re looking at them. What’s going?

You’re not crazy.

It’s not really you.

You are right. You are fine. You are good.

But….

There are pockets around you that are not. They aren’t good. They aren’t fine. They are anxious and distracted and snappy and angry and all of it.

Be aware that the spiritual realm is real. You can feel it. It is not an imaginary place or even a wormhole type conundrum that does not affect life on earth. We ARE affected.

This is where discernment comes in. As a child of God, you have access to information. You have access to wisdom. You just have to ask, “God, is this me? Is what I’m feeling really me? Or is what I’m feeling what’s going on in my house, my city, the world?”

THEN ask Him what to do about it. As saints, Holy ones, our responsibility is to maintain alignment with the Father to keep the crazy of this world out of our minds, hearts and spirits. We can feel it, but not invite it in to play.

If our mind is being attacked, we renew our mind in Christ Jesus. Read scripture, take thoughts captive and not allow them one more minute in our brain. Be the boss and take authority to remove those thoughts in the name of Jesus.

If our heart, our emotions, are being attacked, we ask the Lord to anchor us in truth. We reject any emotions that are not from the Father and don’t flip flop with the shifting tide of our feelings. We rebuke the emotional intrusion and release the Holy Spirit to fill us with His truth.

If our spirit is being attacked, we take authority to command the unclean spirit away from us. We test what is coming against us and thank the Lord that He fights for us and lifts our feet out of the pit. Then we worship. We worship. We worship some more.

We are in this world and not of it, friend. We don’t have to be swayed by the spiritual pollution all around us. We are rooted and grounded in His great love for us and He has equipped us in every way to overcome.

You are fine.

You are good.

Wink, wink.

Kingdom Living

THE “S” WORD

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Listen up! I don’t like it any more than you do. I sure don’t like to say it. I mean, people stare at you with perked up ears and gasping jaws. No one wants to make eye contact, that’s for sure. Their glances from behind their phones and sunglasses are sly and they look away quickly before you can catch them sizing you up.  I mean, you just said the “s” word and that makes all interactions with the people around you AWK-WARD. Yep, super awkward. If your eyes do meet, chances are you’ll want to talk about it with them. Yep, there’s lots of things they’d rather do than talk about the “s” word with a stranger and especially not with you as their friend.

Why is the “s” word so taboo? We hardly even talk about it at church. I mean, it’s in the Bible. Jesus said it.

The trouble with the “s” word is that it makes us have to confront our flesh. It means that we have to look in the mirror and realize that what we comfort ourself with, make excuses for, laugh about or entertain is what Jesus died for. It’s what he took upon his broken and beaten body. It’s what separated him from the Father for those minutes that seemed like eons. It’s what fell on Jesus with such depth that he cried out to the Father, “Why have you forsaken me?” That’s how far away God the Father felt to Jesus on the cross while he was bearing it for all of us. It’s serious. It’s not a cute saying for a t-shirt or our reward for putting up with our kids all day. It’s what the Bible calls SIN.

Now, the good news is that once we confess that sin we are forgiven. God forgets about it. The tricky part is sometimes we don’t. Our flesh craves what we have tried to give up. You know, and sometimes we have wonky thinking like, “God is quick to forgive so we might as well keep doing it.” In our earthly small mindedness, we can’t seem to grasp the depth of the problem of our sin.

There are a few issues with sin, specifically perpetual sin, unrepented sin, sin that we refuse to acknowledge and turn from. This type of sin has the potential to be a place where the enemy can stick his big ol’ foot in the door. He just needs a tiny opening. He just needs a place where we are out of alignment with the Father to have legal access to harass us. Sure, maybe he’s barely noticeable right now. You’re still leading that group at church, you still smile at the drive thru worker, you still read your Bible and hold your hands up high during worship. But that little sin can turn into something bigger until the foothold that the enemy has in your life begins to affect not just you but those around you.

Hmmmm, then what? The t-shirt isn’t so cute anymore. The binge watching of the raunchy TV show isn’t so innocent. The reward of “just letting loose” doesn’t seem like much of a reward when your children and family are now battling the enemy that you allowed to come live in your house. Sin is no longer a little diversion for you but has become an albatross content to take you, your children, and your spouse down with it.

God takes sin serious, ya’ll. He forgives. He forgets. He provided a way of victory from the entanglement of it in our life through Jesus. But we have to submit to the conviction and receive the grace offered to us. We have to stop say “Nope, that’s not sin.” We have to submit to the gentle correction of the Holy Spirit.

One of my favorite scriptures about sin is Psalm 119:133. (And yes, I realize how weird that is to have a favorite scripture about sin.) “Direct my footsteps according to your word; let no sin rule over me.”

Let no sin rule over me. Let no sin have any power over me. Let no sin dictate what my flesh is going to do. Let no sin be more attractive than what you direct in your word. Let no sin be the boss of me or my family. Let no sin open the door to the enemy in my life. Let no sin render me powerless under it’s grip. Let no sin influence me. Let no sin overpower your direction. Let no sin sway me off the path that you have for me. Let no sin draw me closer to the enemy of my soul than the lover of my soul.

Amen

 

Christmas

HOLY ASSIGNMENTS

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Holy assignments carry the likelihood of scars and bruises. No one knew this better than Mary, the mother of Jesus. While some may glorify her life, I can’t help but think of the pain that she endured as a mother. Maybe now that I’m older with my own children, I can sympathize with the consecrated contradiction that flowed in and out of her life.

From the moment the angel messenger spoke the holy words about Mary’s future as the mother of the Savior of the world, her life became a poignant mix of blessing and pain. Just as oil and water can be poured together, but never fully become a new liquid, Mary carried both. She was the mother of the Savior of the world and an outcast who became pregnant without being married. She experienced the joy of obedience to the Lord and had to wonder what her betrothed, Joseph, would say about her news. Would he divorce her? Would he publicly shame her? Mary had a front row seat to Jesus’s miracles and a front row seat to the rejection that fell on him as he ministered. And what mother enjoys seeing her child rejected? She was fully present in all the pain and joy of birthing a child from her young body and fully present in the gruesome crucifixion of the same baby she lovingly swaddled 33 years prior. The blessings in Mary’s life flowed hand in hand with the bruises.

A mentor whispered to me several years ago, “no one gets through this life unscathed.” I didn’t much like her words of wisdom. They fell on ears that didn’t want to receive the reality of this fallen world. But I look at Mary and understand a little more about why this happens. I understand that even though a path is ordained and anointed by the Lord, the obedience that comes with walking it carries the risk of being battered by it.

But in the same breath, the holy assignment is worth the scars. Who is our true witness to this paradigm? The man of sorrows, Mary’s boy child, the savior of the world. There is no more worshipful experience than bringing the sacrifice of praise to the feet of the one who was bruised for you. He was truly despised, rejected and acquainted with grief. He understood the assignment. Because He did, you can, too. You can walk where blessings and bruises flow together, standing firm, knowing that the Lord was pleased to bruise the man of sorrows because it brought righteousness to His people. (Isaiah 53:1-12)

Your holy assignment will likely bring bruises to you, too. Blessings will flow side by side next to pain. It will be messy. It will be exhilarating. It will be completely worth it all.

Lessons learned

AM I BEHIND?

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Have you ever just felt, well, behind? The train has come and gone down the tracks and you didn’t even know you needed to be at the station?  Behind like you look back and have so many dreams that you were ready to seize but instead you are sitting at swimming lessons or standing in lines to get into a decent preschool?  Others your age are having family vacations with other families and you can’t even save enough to go out of town for the weekend without feeling budget deflated?

Just flat behind.

I’m there. Right now. I feel it.

I feel like I am too old to be doing 4th grade math.

When you hit 40, shouldn’t you be living in your dream house already?

Retirement?  Ummmm, maybe we should get on that.

What do you mean I’m “middle-aged?” I just graduated from college 25 years ago!

What is this TikTok thing? Is it new?

I feel all my aspirations of being an amazing contributor to society have been stomped on by tiny, plastic dinosaur feet. And those dinosaurs don’t care at all! They just roar at me all day long.

My heart struggles not with seeing others that are on that darn train, but with the question of “when.”

When?

When is my train coming? Am I really just straggling behind OR was I LEFT behind because I just wasn’t meant to go down that path? Do I resign myself to the here and now OR do I look forward and BELIEVE the dreams that were placed in my spirit are from a Father that really cares for me.

Am I the only one feeling this way? I’m guessing not, friend! Some of you have dreams and hopes that you’ve been holding tightly to and reality is just not cooperating.

I think of dear Elizabeth, the cousin of Jesus’s mother, Mary. I’m sure Elizabeth felt behind. Years of wondering why everyone else had a child left her with years of tears and questions. BUT she found herself with child when others her age were bouncing grandbabies on their knee. (Luke 1:7-25)

Was she behind? No. She was tucked away for a purpose. Elizabeth’s dream of being a mother wouldn’t have unfolded in any more perfect way. The spectacular plan formed by a loving God was the best unveiling of hope that Elizabeth could ever dream of. She knew she wasn’t behind. She was chosen for that season. Her baby was chosen for that season, too.

To rejoice in the place where you are, brings faith to a place where hope can be ignited.  The babe in Elizabeth’s womb rejoiced when the mother of Jesus approached. (Luke 1:41) I suspect that the faith that rose up in Elizabeth concerning not only the child she was carrying, but her cousin’s baby planted hope. They were exactly where they needed to be and the timing was blessed.

God did not let Elizabeth be left behind. He won’t leave you behind either! If God has given you dreams, He will be faithful to bring them to pass. In fact, His timing is beyond what we could ever fully understand. He will turn your barren seasons into glorious answered prayers. He cares about the desires of your heart, because He is the one that planted them there.

So, do I still feel behind? Sometimes I sure do. But I will practice rejoicing in the days where I find myself now. I choose to have faith that the Lord will bring forth the dreams and promises that are hidden in my spirit. And you should too! Cling to the confidence that you are not left behind, you are tucked away for purpose and your season is coming into view!

“For everything there is a season and a time for every matter under heaven.” Ecclesiastes 3:1

Lessons learned

THE DAY I MET JERRY

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My eyes caught a glimpse of him. The salt and pepper scraggles poking out of his beard drew my attention. I motioned toward my husband with my eyes and head. We surveyed the weather worn straw hat, saw the heavy glasses held together with duct tape and caught a glance of the shirt that he had tucked carefully into his dirt packed jeans held up by a worn-out leather belt. And then we cringed. His shoes were nothing but the remnants of some old work boots literally wrapped with tape. No soles, toes poking through, but meticulously laced with a portion of shoestring. My breath left me when I watched him walk out of the store leaning on a cane as his feet literally turned onto his ankles. He was walking on his ankles as though they were the bottoms of his feet. And he hobbled out as though it was normal. We followed him knowing our path had to meet his.


He had been in the store on a desperate hunt for new shoes, but his search was complicated by his shoe size, 15EEE. I was determined to locate a pair of shoes for this soul. I was confident that God would provide them. I knew our meeting was arranged by Him. There was a pair of size 15EEE in this town and they were ordained for this time. I stepped away and frantically began calling each and every shoe store that Google could find. Nothing. Nothing even close. How could that be? This man needed shoes and my God provides. God drew my eye and my heart toward this man. He put me there to help provide for this need. What do you mean there isn’t a size 15EEE in this town?
I gathered my emotions and walked back to where my husband was visiting with him. I shook my head when my husband looked at me. I couldn’t find any. The man was not surprised. He shared how a church had gifted him a size 16 but they didn’t fit. They hurt his feet. He was content to drag around his taped boots rather than have his feet hurt.


And then my spirit was rattled. I offered to pray over him not thinking there was anything else we could do. Our new friend, Jerry, said he believed God would heal him. Pray for that. Ouch! While I had been diligently searching for what I saw as Jerry’s greatest need, I should have looked with my spiritual eyes. His greatest need was simply to be healed. He knew it and he believed it would happen. Why had I not thought of that first?
There are those in this world who see things with those keen, spiritual goggles. They recognize the child not reading as needing security, not phonics. They see the mom yelling in the grocery store not as out of control but as exhausted and needing 5 minutes peace.


The greatest need of any individual at any given time is probably not what we see on the outside. The layers of what is visible only hide the sores, the wounds, or maybe cover the hopes and beliefs that keep getting buried under the distractions so prominent to our physical eyes. In Jerry’s case, beyond-repair boots versus his desire to be healed. I only saw the boots.


I am guilty of being a “fixer” and I find myself trying to fix what isn’t necessarily the biggest (or real?) need. Why is this? Why can’t we all see straight to the hidden, straight to the tender places in the soul, instead of trying to guess based on our own observation? Why can’t we carry our pair of spiritual goggles tucked discreetly in our belt ready to whip out at a moment’s notice? Well, how often do we even take time to look? How often do we take time to listen? My tendency to “fix” has to yield to asking the Holy Spirit for his revelation and allowing him to take the lead.

Jerry hobbled on his way that day. I almost couldn’t bear to watch him as he struggled down the sidewalk. I secretly hoped that he was actually an angel in disguise and that God just needed to teach me a lesson. I didn’t want to believe I couldn’t help him in some way or that he left our meeting without a visible healing. I don’t know where he slept that night or if he ever found any boots to fit him. I don’t know if his feet were ever miraculously turned to the correct position or if he still hobbles on his ankles. I only know and have confidence in the fact that our God is a healer of both the visible and the carefully-hidden wounds. I know that when the Healer hands me my own spiritual goggles, I only have to do what He tells me. I don’t have to try and fix anything on my own. I just have to listen and obey. The healing isn’t my assignment. Being available is. Thank you, Jerry, for reminding me of this.


Peace

TIME-OUT

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Did you hear about Texas’s snowmaggedon a little over a month ago? Maybe you saw us poor Texans shivering on the nightly news. Or maybe you were living it and felt like at any time the Yeti from the frozen tundra would show up to walk down your hometown streets. Truthfully, we are not made or prepared in any way for temperatures that drop below freezing.

I know that being in my house for 34 hours without heat or water was wearing on my mental health. I am not typically one that rolls with the punches very well. In fact, while other families were playing games, roasting smores and “making memories,” I was holding back tears laying under multiple layers of blankets and checking the weather app every 15 minutes. Can anyone relate? In fact, at one point my husband warmed up his truck and sent me to a time-out in the Ford. I cried. I cried big tears. I also asked God if crying was showing lack of faith and if He was disappointed in me.

Guess what? God was OK with my timeout. He was OK with my sobbing tears. He was OK that I wasn’t feeling the “it’s just like camping” vibe and embracing every moment. You know what mattered to Him? It mattered that I brought all my snotty tears to Him to wipe away. It mattered that I took a breath and let the Comforter do His job. It mattered that I was there for my family as best as I could be.

I felt peace. I stopped condemning myself for being upset. I recognized that the enemy wanted to take that opportunity to make me feel “less than” and churn up a storm in my thoughts. He’s a liar, in case you didn’t know. I climbed out of the Ford and walked back into the cold, dark house with dry eyes.

I still laid under several layers of blankets.

I still checked the weather app.

I still let out a huge “thank you Jesus” when the power returned.

However, “Peace! Be STILL” was what I breathed in.

My mind was at rest and my heart was anchored in the One that is the Prince of Peace. The one that calms the storm in our spirit, in our thoughts and in our heart is always near.

I am OK because my Prince of Peace gently whispered “be still” to my raging emotions.

Take a timeout, sisters, when the enemy is brewing waves around you and in you.

“And he awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the sea,

          “Peace! Be still!” Mark 4:39 ESV

 

 

amycravey.com Let Go Post
Parenting

LET GO

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When the boy in our home started kindergarten, some major mountains began to slide ominously into our line of sight. Misguided words spoken by experts caused much pain and doubt in my heart. I desperately desired to do what was right by my son. I desperately desired to do what was right by my Heavenly Father. The tug between what the expert said and what I knew in my heart shredded the confidence I had as a mom.

One evening I was sitting in a class at church. My heart and mind were turned to auto-pilot out of sheer exhaustion from the weight I was carrying. I closed my eyes during a time of worship, and God hijacked my thoughts.

In my glorified imagination, I saw myself walking hand-in-hand with my son to the throne of God. It was apparent to me that the Lord wanted me to leave my son there, in the throne room with Him.

In my mind, I dropped my son’s hand and took a few steps in reverse, never turning my back to God. I kneeled down to the floor, sat back on my knees and waited with my hands in my lap. I never took my eyes off of my son. The Lord said, “Try again.” So, I tried again.

I repeated it…. the hand-in-hand walk with my son to the throne. I dropped his hand once more, turned to walk out, and got closer to leaving, but just couldn’t do it.

God asked me, “Why can’t you trust your son with me? I love him far more than you do.” Ummmmm . . . ouch.

Well, third time’s a charm. I boldly walked to the throne of God, left my son with Him, and confidently walked away. My son never tried to go with me or even give the faintest inkling that he didn’t want to stay with the Lord. And while I know that we don’t really have any idea what the Lord might look like, I was left with the impression of His loving smile delighting over my son.

What a lesson the Lord taught me that night! My words had always declared that my children were merely gifts from the Lord, and while my heart genuinely echoed that, somewhere deep in my spirit there was doubt. That night, the Lord revealed to me that He couldn’t work in a place where I wasn’t seeing Him as trustworthy. That night, I had to lay down the protection I thought I was providing over my son, and walk away.

The Lord had been so merciful to me as He allowed me to practice the process of letting go, in my mind, until I got it right. What a sweet strategy He showed me that night! Our glorified imagination can really weave patterns of obedience and bravery that we can follow up with our actions.

The events following that encounter were miraculous. After I was able to fully trust the Lord with my son, all the mountains that had been put in our way were removed. The Lord showed up and revealed a root cause of the issue my son was having. He provided a God-fearing teacher who spoke life and encouragement. I was able to cast all of those expert words under my feet as I walked out the victory that the Lord had for my son.

Would we have experienced that victory if I had maintained that tight grip? Maybe. But I believe that my desire to shelter the little man in my life was also sheltering him from the breakthrough that his loving Heavenly Father had destined for him. My grip on my son’s hand mirrored the tight grip I had on the situation we found ourselves in. I was preventing any and all interference, and that included the mercy of the Lord.

Oh, the things the Lord can do if we just let go and lay it down. Friend, lay down what you are holding tightly in your hand. The Lord is trustworthy. Let go and watch Him work.

“They will have no fear of bad news; their hearts are steadfast trusting in the Lord.”

Psalm 112:7

out of focus lights on rainy weather
Taking thoughts captive

AUTO-CORRECT

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My name is Amy Cravey.  Yes, I know. It sounds a little like “crazy” and can be confused with “gravy.” In fact, my father-in-law suggested naming our daughter Biscuits Ann so that she would have a yummy, southern name.  I didn’t go for it, obviously.  

However, the mail I get shows that people just can’t process the name “Cravey” for some reason. I get mail addressed to the “Carvey Family.” They sound like a nice family. Sometimes it comes to the “Crarey’s,” which is about as confusing as “Cravey.”  I have just gotten used to always spelling my name. C-R-A-V as in Victor-E-Y. And inevitably the person I am spelling it to gets a quirky smile on their face. 

It’s at that moment that I know even though I carefully spelled my name, they auto-corrected in their mind. I know, I spelled it out, but they heard “CRAZY” and they typed it in that way too. Their minds reverted to what they “thought” they heard, not what I actually said.  If I had a dollar for every time this has happened–well, you know. BUT it happens. Over and over it happens. 

You know we do that in other areas of our lives, too.  For example, when stress hits hard, we might revert back to old eating habits even though we have faithfully been munching on lentils and carrots for 6 months. When scary diagnoses are spoken, the fear rises, even though we say we trust the Lord with our life. We auto-correct to what we used to know, what we think we know, or how we think our reactions should play out. 

Have you ever been in a situation where someone is just confidently calm in the midst of chaos? Every bit of them is just operating against what the circumstances seem to dictate. They did NOT auto-correct. They weren’t swayed by their emotions or memories or previous triggers. They just stood. Grounded.

The Bible tells us in Romans 12: “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.” 

So, here we go. One way to not auto-correct in situations and events that might be less than fabulous in our lives is the daily discipline of renewing our minds. What does that mean? Good stuff in and bad stuff out! If you’re wallowing in all the doom and gloom, then your reaction is going to be doom and gloom. If you’re filling your mind with the good stuff, it’s going to be so much harder to auto-correct to doom and gloom when your life gets jiggled around.  

Ephesians 4:31-32 says “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”  

Making a habit of forgiving and releasing people who hurt you lessens the chance that you cling to offense and, in return, poison yourself.  And boy oh boy, we sure think we are entitled to hold onto grudges and judgments against others. Heads up, buttercup– holding onto offense doesn’t give us power. It sucks the life out of us! It’s like drinking poison and thinking it will hurt our offender. Stop it.

Auto-correcting to our fleshly responses never ends well. And it’s hard! It’s soooo hard to practice daily the renewing of our minds and the releasing of our offenses. But I don’t want to be known as the person who overreacts when trouble comes. I don’t want to feel wobbly and unstable when fear tries to creep in. I don’t want to fly off the handle in a barrage of rambling words when I feel judged or pressured.  I don’t want to auto-correct to “CRAZY.” I don’t! 

And I don’t want you to auto-correct to what you used to know, what you think you know or how you think your reactions should play out. Join me. Practice renewing and releasing. Let’s put an end to our auto-correct kind of life and embrace peace, confidence and security in knowing our reactions are grounded in Christ and not influenced by things we have already put behind us.